No One Is Ready for Obi-Wan’s Life Story

forcearama:

Anakin’s Force Ghost: Hey, son. 
Luke: [meditating] Oh, hey Dad. You meet Rey?
Anakin: [casually eating a space pear] Oh yeah. Sweet kid. She’ll do well. 
Luke: I agree. [pause] Where is Rey, anyways?
Anakin: Oh, I left her out in the garden with Obi-Wan.
Luke: [stricken] You…you left my new student…with Obi-Wan.
Anakin: Yeah, so what?
Luke: Damn it, Dad! We want her to want to be a Jedi!
Anakin: What the hell are you talking about?! She does want to be a Jedi!
Luke: Not if you leave her with Obi-Wan, she won’t! 
Anakin: Are you serious? How is Obi-Wan Kenobi going to talk someone out of being a Jedi?! 
Luke: Dad. He’s going to scare her off. He’s going to tell her his stories. Rey? Is not ready for Obi-Wan’s stories. Frankly, I’m not sure I’m ready for them.  
Anakin: What stories? He doesn’t have any – oh. OH. [bolts out of the room] 

[in the garden]
Obi-Wan: …and that’s about the time that I found out Darth Maul was still alive. 
Rey: [horrified] Wh– what? How? No! 
Obi-Wan: [nodding] Oh yes, it’s true. Of course, I did eventually kill him.
Rey: Oh, good.
Obi-Wan: …about 20 years later. It gave me something to do while I lived in isolation in the desert, after Anakin turned to the Dark Side. 
Rey: What?! Oh my –
Anakin: [rushing over] Ohhhkay, Uncle Ben, I think it’s time for Rey to do some saber practice. 
Rey: But did he just say that you –
Anakin: [nervous laughter, leading her away] –all right, sweetheart, let’s just get you all set up over here. [mouthing over his shoulder to Obi-Wan] I’m gonna kill you again.
Rey: [calling behind her] I’m really sorry about…all of those things, Mr. Kenobi! 
Anakin: Don’t worry about him. [sotto voce] He endured a lot of head trauma in the Clone Wars. He has good days and bad.
Rey: [knowingly] Ohhhh.